About Your Recent Facebook Friend Request

I’d like to say “I don’t Facebook” but the truth is that like 1.4 billion others I do have a personal FB account.

For a number of reasons I don’t spend much time on there anymore. I better not get started on that subject or you’ll be stuck reading my 2000 word diatribe on why I think the greedy insincere little shit who runs it belongs in jail.

I mean really. Have you seen their “But then something happened” apology commercial?

Yeah something happened alright. You greedy motherf*ckers decided that money was more important than our privacy and you sold all our data to the f*cking Russians!

And then while you were busy telling us how you were creating a new model that would redefine modern journalism – apparently in a way that didn’t include actual journalists or pesky little details like fact-checking, because as weasel-boy put it  “Facebook never sought to become a publisher”, you shit-bags decided it was okay to accept truckloads of cash from propaganda mongers hell-bent on subverting our democracies; thereby giving wings to ridiculous fake news stories like #Pizzagate or the Pope supposedly endorsing… Cheetolini for President.

*Takes deep breath and steps back from the brink*

You said this wasn’t going to be a 2000 word rant so get to your point already Norm.

Okay, yeah. My point:

For some reason I’ve received quite a few new Facebook friend/connection requests from my existing WordPress and Instagram contacts lately.

I haven’t accepted any of those requests and won’t be any time in the near future. It’s not that I’m being anti-social and I assure you I’m not ignoring or boycotting anyone. It’s just that I decided long ago that aside from using it to keep in touch with close friends and family Facebook wasn’t going to be for me.

I log on about once a week and spend a few minutes finding out about any family events or birthdays I need to know about and then get the hell off before I’m tempted to like or comment on anything and inadvertently end up feeding the data-hungry beast.

So if you were among those who sent me a request and I haven’t responded I just want you to know, it’s not you – it’s me 😉

And it goes back to way before the Cambridge Analytica scandal. Back in 2014 I first noticed to what levels these greedy mofos would stoop with our data.  It was a couple of weeks before my 5oth birthday and I started seeing ads in my feed reminding me that men my age should think about having regular colonoscopies. Really Facebook? You want to talk to me about shoving cameras up my butt? Well, low and behold there was an ad for a convenient nearby private clinic I could go to have it done with no waiting!

I realize that some may actually find this convenient, but to me it was intrusive beyond words.

From that point on I stripped all of my data from the site and frankly I don’t know what’s keeping me from just closing the account completely.

So before I start ranting again please know that you can feel free to connect with me here, or on Twitter, Instagram or even via email. And yes I know that FB owns IG too.

The point of my point is: While I do love to interact with a wide variety of individuals from all over the globe on any number of topics – it just won’t be on Facebook.

Cheers!

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About Norm 2.0

World’s youngest grumpy old man & heart failure wonder boy. Interests: writing, woodworking, photography, travel, tennis, wine, and I know a bit about power tools.
This entry was posted in Opinions and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

66 Responses to About Your Recent Facebook Friend Request

  1. Val says:

    Haha, and there’s me thinking you’re ‘only about doors’, 😉 (I come here occasionally, usually after visiting Dan’s blog). Well, you’ve never received a friend request from me. I deleted my FB account a few weeks ago and good riddance! I hate the site.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m hardly on facebook anymore. I do look at it for family and friend stuff. But I don’t look at the ads on there.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Amy says:

    I’m rarely on FB and sometimes think of closing it down, but I like to keep up on my family. I have had requests, mostly from IG users, but I keep my personal page as private as possible. It really is ridiculous all of the information they gather. I’ve even pulled back on my IG time. It reminds me of Orwell “Who controls the present, controls the past: Who controls the past controls the future.”

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Suzanne says:

    Great rant, and something we are all thinking. I cut back my “friends” list considerably more than a year ago, after sending countless emails to people who type yes and amen when prompted to do so by some heart wrenching bogus post. I even sent a link to folks from a documentary aired by one of the networks CBS, NBC or ABC, which explained how hackers steal information via FB. That broadcast did not even begin to address current issues with FB. Point being, you can lead a horse to water…but after countless cautionary conversations, and reliable reporting, people still put their private information in harms way and continued to send hateful posts and bogus images. Then, with privacy controls as tight as a drum, my friends list culled and lean, accepting NO new followers, FB goes to a new low. That is when I started posting photographs on Instagram and weening myself off FB. I found like-minded people to follow who do the same. So far, I like the “positive” images and feedback that this forum allows. I am not naive enough to think that it will not be or is not already corrupted, but at least it feels like a safe, positive place.

    I have done some soul searching about my addiction to FB and have decided that the time has come. I am gathering phone numbers from friends and family (that I still respect) and adding them to my contacts list. When that is completed, I WILL PULL THE PLUG. My exit will not be noticed, but I will feel better about myself for having taken an action that I is consistent with my beliefs.

    Thanks Norm for opening up this discussion with a candid and honest post. Man, you look so mild and gentlemanly. Good surprise!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. marianallen says:

    I didn’t know Canadians were allowed to curse. See — you hang out on the internet, you learn things. Besides being a writer, I’m the person everybody asks to do searches for them, so I think I broke FB’s algorithm: I never know WHAT they’re going to decide about me.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. joey says:

    I’m hardly on there, either. Less and less over the years. I love my word games there, though. How awful am I? Come for the people, stay for the word games. Heh. My mother is upset because she joined as people began to flee… Am now a bad daughter if I don’t stalk her feed on the regular 😛
    Of course, I love your takes on Facebook, so I love this post! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  7. scooj says:

    I’m with you on this. FB is strictly for close friends and family, and only occasionally used. Nice to see a bit of passion thrown into a post~!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Norm, I think it’s important you bring up these points. Facebook lost its innocence (if that was ever possible) years ago. I belong to a couple of groups and also keep up with friends and family, but even when I post an IG photo, I rarely get engagement from it. I keep the account so I can maintain my blog page on Second Wind Leisure for sharing others’ posts, but who is really reading? Even IG is becoming heavy with ads and sponsored posts. What happened to just sharing our photos? Until the last year, I have tried to remain sentimental about FB, after all, I met the man who became my husband there 9 years ago (we went to high school together over 30+ years ago). I’m on the fence about deleting it, though. Time will tell. The problem with being online on any platform privacy went out that door years ago. Google your name and you’ll see yourself everywhere.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Dan Hen says:

    Calm down , calm down . I hope I wasn’t one who sent a friend request . There have been other incidents when a FB request was sent in my name without my knowledge . Don’t quite know how that works , or who is running the show . I am fatalistic about it , though . The virtual universe has a life of its own .

    Liked by 1 person

  10. So many people people feel the same way, Norm, yet most still don’t delete their Facebook account (for various reasons). I deleted my Facebook account about a year ago (for various reasons and before all the news came out about how they shared our data). I wrote a post giving my reasons and, like your post, had lots of people saying they’d do the same, but there was something stopping them from doing so. I’ve never looked back since pressing the delete button and haven’t noticed any difference in traffic to my blog from Facebook. If I had my way, I’d shut the whole site down with a click of a button. There’s a lot more going on behind the scenes at Facebook than we know. Hopefully, it will come out and Facebook will go the same way as MySpace did. In fact, I think it’s probably already heading that way.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Thanks Hugh. Yes I remember your post about this. I’m getting closer to hitting the delete button but I just haven’t been able to pull the trigger just yet.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Val says:

        Norm, you can deactivate it if you want, then if you feel you are missing it, you can return. And if you feel you never want to see it you can pop back, and just delete the fucker to hell…

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Tell us how you really feel about Zuckerberg and Facebook, Norm! 😀 You won’t be happy to hear that apparently Facebook gave data access to a Chinese firm flagged by U.S. Intelligence officials as a national security threat!! I am a user and I feel embarrassed that I can’t bring myself to quit. Admire those who do.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Thank Angela. Yes I heard about that yesterday. I’m not sure if the source for this report was someone within that Intelligence Service or from the current regime residing at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. If this turns out to be fact from a reliable source it may just be the last straw for me. We’ll see.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Can’t say much more. I’m on FB and have made my area as private as possible (which according to that article, isn’t that much) and I’ve used it a lot less in the last year. I tried to watch some of Zuckerberg testifying before Congress but had to stop before long or I would have thrown up. He could be a champion dodgeball player because he can dodge everything.

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Thanks Janet. Well your Congress was throwing him softballs that were pretty easy to tee-up on. Some of the ridiculously clueless questions these “legislators” were asking him were frankly embarrassing.
      If you saw any of his EU session they came at him a lot harder, with much more pointed and well-informed questions. His go-to answer was “I don’t have that specific information with me but I’ll look into it and get back to you” – yeah right.

      Like

  13. JT Twissel says:

    I try to avoid facebook as much as possible. These are indeed squirrely times we live in.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Oh, and some devices even listen in. The microphones. Seriously, I’m not a nutcase 🤣
    (And in my defense, I didn’t want to be involved in buying people’s data but the corporation was bigger than me…)

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Hahah, love this. I’m one of the proud 114 human beings who are not on Facebook (anymore). They also sell your data to advertisers. I know coz in my previous job we were buying them. They can track what sites you’ve browsed, they have your phone number, your consumption habits… there is no end to it.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. I never got around to getting myself a facebook account, and I’m not so sad about it anymore.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Tara says:

    I deleted my account, not that I used it much, when they started ramping up the facial recognition technology. Then I read an article about what they do with all the data people put on the site. I was thankful I deleted my account after that. This was back in 2014 or so.

    As a former journalist, I’m disgusted when places like Facebook dare to say they are, were, or will be journalists. Of course, I’m disgusted that TV news calls itself journalism as well. That would be MY 2,000 word rant, so I’ll stop here. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Oh the conversations we could have about the state of journalism at the moment. The info-tainment industry is what’s making it so easy for the current American regime to discredit and devalue true journalism, just when it’s needed most 😦

      Liked by 1 person

  18. I’m not a big fan either, although I also have an account. What I don’t have are a lot of Facebook friends. I subscribe mostly to various photography groups and other similar social/informational groups.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Perfect rant! I deleted my facebook account 4 yrs ago or maybe it’s been longer now. I thought they were too intrusive then. I don’t miss it. Family and I keep each other in “the loop”, and my closest friends and I stay in touch outside of facebook.
    I still IG but, it’s a photo platform so I keep it.

    I rarely check in with Twitter anymore, and outside of my WP posts that get posted there automatically I don’t Tweet. I retweet WP post of those I follow from time to time, but that’s it.

    My profile on what few social media sites I do have is largely blank. I keep receiving emails asking me complete my profile. NOT GONNA HAPPEN!

    Thanks for letting me know about your fb policy, but it won’t be me asking you to Friend me on the fb platform. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Carrie Rubin says:

    I’m not a fan of Facebook either. If it wasn’t for my public author page, I probably wouldn’t be on there. I don’t do much with my personal page, and I’ve kept my friend list small. Mostly family. And I agree—it’s very intrusive with its ads.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Also, with the way they are constantly fiddling with privacy settings I feel a need to go back in for a periodic audit, to verify what others can see and what info I’m giving FB access to.

      Liked by 1 person

  21. Almost Iowa says:

    I deleted my Facebook account earlier this year when I discovered Facebook was sifting through my browser history. What makes them think that they can do that? What kind of mind would consider that appropriate? It is like inviting a neighbor over for a BBQ then finding them going through your underwear drawer.

    From GizmodoYou Probably Don’t Know All the Ways Facebook Tracks You

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Thanks for sharing this. I just went over to read it. Scary. In my opinion this is the part that isn’t resonating with enough of us yet: “Facebook does not charge its users for access, yet makes billions of dollars. The users are the product.”
      I didn’t know it was tracking browser history but it does not surprise me. Lately I’m seeing some very odd “people you may know” friend suggestions that I only interact with on here and are not among my regular email contacts. Only conclusion I can draw is that they are mining this data from somewhere deep within my computer without my implicit consent.
      Time again to re-evaluate what I’m getting from it vs. what I’m giving up in return.
      On another subject: Boxers or briefs? Hey, Facebook advertisers need to know 😉

      Like

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  23. Lynn says:

    Facebook seems to hold such a love/hate relationship with people. I find myself posting less & less & I couldn’t agree more in regards to people posting things they know nothing about, nor have they fact checked the shit they are posting. The positive side is it does allow me to stay connected to people I don’t see on a regular basis, whether that is due to distance or just life getting in the way. Such a conundrum!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Thanks Lynn. Staying in touch with distant loved ones is an alluring enticement and one of the reasons I’m still on there too.
      The whole idea of people sharing and re-posting crap that’s obviously false is truly scary. We all have a loudmouthed, ill-informed uncle who still has an opinion on everything, even when he has no clue what he’s talking about. Before we just had to put up with him a couple of times a year at family gatherings. We could just roll our eyes, steer the conversation onto another topic and move on. Now Uncle racist has a megaphone called social media and a never-ending stream of equally opinionated people to argue or agree with him and keep the mean-spirited conversations going endlessly.

      Like

  24. Dan Antion says:

    I have been spending less and less time on Facebook since 2016. I was really turned off by the run-up to the election. I use the platform to stay in contact with a few people, but that’s about it. I have avoided Instagram because I don’t like the way they ignore digital rights management. I’ve largely stayed off of Flickr (and made my site private) while Verizon has owned them. I will make that site public again, after the Smugmug deal closes. Our privacy is ours to protect – solid rant, Norm!

    Liked by 2 people

  25. I see zero difference between Facebook and all other tools we use, including our phone and credit card (except that they got caught, like Volkswagen). It’s not that everybody else doesn’t use the data they have on us to some degree of personal gain, including politicians.

    So many bitch about FB but continue to use it. I find this a sign of the times. They have turned us all into just the kind of malleable dough they can work with. Back in the days there was only Hollywood.

    Just like any other tool, it depends on how you use it and for what. As Joanne says above, it certainly helps you see through people. I’ve already removed some toxicity this way and the process continues.

    But I am sorry for the request I sent. I wasn’t aware of your position on it but I sure am now. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ohh! Maybe I only sent a private message, not sure…

      Liked by 1 person

      • Norm 2.0 says:

        Yes it was a private message and there is no need to apologize 🙂
        I sincerely hope you know that this post was not about any one request or message. I have received roughly a dozen in the last month from different WP and IG contacts and just wanted folks to know why I won’t be responding.
        Plus it was fun to bitch about FB: the platform that everyone loves to hate (but still uses) 😀
        You’re absolutely right of course, ALL social media is making use of our private data for profit.
        I think the reasons why everyone is pissed at FB would include:
        1. They were by far the most successful at it, in terms of number of users and volume of data collected.
        2. They got caught red handed.
        3. Their apology was insincere to the point of insulting.
        4. They allowed data to be used for purposes of blatant political influence. Somehow to many, taking money from advertisers for our personal data to sell us dish soap or soft drink feels less heinous than taking money from subversive foreign elements trying to affect our emotional state in order to influence supposedly democratic elections.
        I too have cut ties with a number of family and friends after seeing their darker sides on social media. Hateful, mean-spirited, racist behavior saddens me, especially when it comes from people I care about. I do question my wisdom for doing this though. After all, how can I hope to influence others towards more positive viewpoints if I myself put up the barriers?
        I struggle with this one….

        Liked by 1 person

        • Tara says:

          I think most people are so set in their views, it’s pointless to try to influence them. Nice wish, though. 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

          • Norm 2.0 says:

            I’ve read a fair amount lately on propaganda and disinformation techniques and how and why they work. Unfortunately what I’ve read does suggest that you’re right about this. After a certain age it seems our brains are more hard-wired than most of us realize. Many of us who like to think we’re open-minded are not nearly as receptive to opposing viewpoints as we think we are.

            Liked by 1 person

        • They are counting on this struggle. Like all those who say that it’s pointless to vote. Slovenia has just had parliamentary elections with the lowest amount of people voting ever. Do I need to say that the right won?

          Liked by 1 person

          • Norm 2.0 says:

            If I remember correctly Yugoslavia began breaking up in the early 1990’s so I assume you’re old enough to remember life in what was then a communist country.
            Do me a favor and set aside a few bottles of good Italian wine. They’ll come in handy for some interesting late-night conversations when we’re there. I’m going to have soooo many questions about your views on the current global social/political climate.
            I’m also trying to get a handle on what’s happening in Italy right now – not sure what to think yet.

            Liked by 1 person

            • Quoting amore on Italy right now: “People are bored of politicians and they were voting against this system and the result is the victory of the anti-system.” Practically the same as Trump and Brexit and everything.

              Ohh, when you arrive we could do nothing but drink wine and chat. 😀 Yes, I grew up in Yugoslavia and was 21 when Slovenia got independent. Yugoslavia was not as communist as the eastern bloc countries though, more socialist and non-aligned. We had a grand time: we were able to travel everywhere (just pay tax on goods when importing so we smuggled), we watched both American and Russian films, we had everything for free: education, health…, there was a HUGE emphasis on culture, which I see only now that I can compare my upbringing with that of people in other countries or, God forbid, present-day education.

              I can answer any question that you have, here or in mail, even before you get here. 🙂 But generally, it’s a world-wide problem. Negativity trumps.

              Liked by 2 people

  26. Sherry Felix says:

    I do the same. I have an account and spend little time in it. If someone i know sends me a comment or note in FB I respond by email. Same with all the other social media platforms. This is the only one I respond to. I can’t abide insincere platitudes and politics make me cringe.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      Thanks Sherry. For the most part I agree with what you’re saying.
      When it comes to politics I feel that the decisions made and the laws passed directly affect our lives so tuning it all out and leaving it to others to decide for us is akin to giving up our freedom.
      In today’s climate it can be downright exhausting though.
      And rational debates about the merits or drawbacks of any given policy are long gone; it’s all just demonizing, name-calling, and shouting matches. Very disheartening 😦

      Like

  27. Ruth says:

    Ha ha ha – I really love the ‘so what’ button at the end… if only! It’s probably the one I’d use more than any other 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  28. quiall says:

    We’re all thinking it! Excellent post.

    Liked by 1 person

  29. Joanne Sisco says:

    Amen. Preach it long and loud!

    It’s not lost on me that I too keep my FB account while I abhor the platform. While I agree with your rant about privacy, my rant has a different flavour. It’s the type and frequency of content posted by my family and friends – content that is misinformation at best, and racist at worst. If nothing else, FB is helping me separate the wheat from the chaff.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      As I told Manja earlier, I too have been saddened by some of the mean-spirited hateful things I’ve seen from people close to me that I thought I knew. The spreading of obviously false info and the overall lack of critical thinking are what scares me most.

      Liked by 1 person

  30. renxkyoko says:

    Oh, wow ! Great post !

    Liked by 1 person

  31. I am the perfect reader to be the first to like this rant because I feel exactly the same way. I went in over the weekend and made sure there was zero info on my personal accounts. I have two business pages attached so I have to stay there, but I spend about fifteen minutes a week on there. I use to scroll through but then realized my brain cells were dying reading and watching what people I know feel should be shared and then add in fake personal and national news, and I was done. I still laugh thinking about our fellow humans who thought FB was some type of invisible charity and they were protecting our data. How did they think FB was employing 25,000+ employees and Z got to be worth $76.5B?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Norm 2.0 says:

      You’re right Judy, they certainly aren’t offering up the platform to us for any reason other than profit. Like most people I have no problem with them taking money from people trying to sell me dish soap or soft drink, but I draw the line at colonoscopies and subversive political influence.

      Liked by 1 person

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